Broken inside

What a very stressful beginning of new year.. I have no courage to study. Keep thinking of him and hows my life going after this.. oh God.. What should I do.. I have no idea why this things happen. Maybe because of some reason that I don't know. Huhu.. By the way, I have my new room mate, Jennifer. She is very nice,friendly and easy going.. ^__^ . but i miss my ex room mate..Inaaaaa... I miss u... Huhuhuu...

Hurmm..anyway.. maybe i Should go to church today. Not maybe,but must. Because when I keep thinking about this,,i Wont get the best solution.. I need my community to support me. I need my friends to advice me. I need God to lead me. I don't want to keep focusing on my problems coz I will be slowly dying.. I wont let it to happen. Oh God,cheer me up please..

Dear someone,

I'm so sorry for everything wrong I've done to you.. I know I shouldn't do certain things. It hurts u a lot. I know. I'm sorry. You said, you learn a lot from me. I'm sorry for that too. I think I'm not a good person that gives a good examples for you to learn. I made a lot of mistakes. So many. Forgive me please,,please.. I also hide so many things from you.. I don't know I want to confess it all to you or not,,maybe someday. not now..

You know dear,,I miss you so badly.. I want to talk to u,i want to tell you my stories... huhuhu.. I miss laughing like crazy with you. I want you to listen to my stories,my problems,my dreams,everything.... I miss u.. I miss u so much.. Hmm... but maybe this is the best for you. not contacting with me is the best for you maybe.. I will try to get use of it. its very hard for me actually. But i will get use of it slowly. But i'm still looking forward to meet u.

Have a great life then. Maybe without me you will success more. Thanks for everything MR.O..

I love u.. I miss u.. God bless you more.. ^_^